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Guest Blog: “Hot, Love, Drama” Edition – By Eric Blair

Guest Blog: “Hot, Love, Drama” Edition – By Eric Blair

And we’re back…What’s on my mind this week? Ahh! That’s it, relationships!
Not the good or bad times in the relationship; more like the confusing times. The
following are moments when relationships stop being complex and just get absurd. “The
Relationship Article: Hot Love Drama edition.” Okay, enough of reality shows
references. Let’s get back to real life. I need to understand the reasoning behind the
following topics friends with benefits, instant relationships and long drama breakups, and
baby momma and daddy drama. I really don’t have any answers or rational reasoning for
these issues. I just want a better understanding of why we put ourselves through
unnecessary drama. Is it in our nature as humans to deal with drama from another party?
Why can’t we just walk away from simpleton confrontation? Is it pride, or do we need to
prove our point to ignorant people? I just want someone to help me out here, seriously.
What’s your reasoning? I know a few people might relate to a topic or two. I have a
Facebook page. Drop me a line or two if you could answer or have some insight to give
me. Honestly, I am really perplexed by, “The Hot Love Drama.”

Have you ever had a friend with benefits? Of course you have! We all had one at
some point. For people out there who are not sure what a “friend with benefits” is, it’s
when people are engage in sexual intercourse without being in a relationship. Very few
go on to be something bigger and most just remain as a booty call. Okay, now we’re all
up to speed and some of us are shocked that we are or have been, a booty call. It’s okay, it
happens to the best of us. I’m not saying there is anything wrong with sexual friendships
or as I like to call them “sexships.” Believe me, I’ve my share! Keep it safe at all times.
Anywhooo, I digress, I do not understand the drama, lies, and pettiness that come with
some sexships. To my logic, it’s a silent agreement, sometimes verbalized between two
adults to just go with the flow. Going with the flow doesn’t involve snooping,
questioning, jealousy, stalking, breaking an entry, baby father/mother drama, hiding
second family, crazy calls from current girl/boyfriend, or any other unnecessary idiocy.
This drama defeats the propose of the sexship. It’s like breaking an unspoken contract.
The point of a sexship is to circumvent the complexity of a relationship. So, why do
people continue to deal with this mayhem? No sex is so great for one to deal with drama
when he or she is not in a relationship. Why do men put up with crazy woman and
women put up with lying, cheating men. There are too many people in the world to deal
with one another’s antics. I want everyone from here on out, before you move forward in
a sexship, be true and real to yourself and the other person in the sexship. If you have a
wife, girl, man, husband or anything of that nature; tell the other person about your
significant other to divert drama. For the other side, if you feel that they are being sneaky,
dishonest, strange, or just plain old crazy, abort mission! I repeat: abort mission! At the
end of the day, it’s just sex. Give the other person enough respect to say yes or no upon
entering into this sexship. Eight times out of ten, you’ll be surprised with their answer.

What’s an instant relationship you ask? It’s like instant oatmeal, instead of water
just add sex and we’re boy/girlfriend. There’s nothing wrong with mutual sex or a
sexship, but there is something wrong with knowing a woman/man for two weeks, having
some alright sex and now wanting to be partners. Wait. Slow up, you don’t know each
other well enough to be in a relationship. Is it the bright lights and sublime fantasy charm
of a new person of attraction? When did things turn for the bizarro? (A Superman
reference, hehehe.) Sex followed immediately by a relationship. Doesn’t anyone get an
option to say no anymore? It’s just what it is…Cool. Why are people getting into

relationships with people they barely know? This only leads one thing: drama! Help me
out here; is one party afraid to say “no” or “I’d prefer get to know you first?” Why are
people putting themselves into predicaments that will only cause chaos? No sex has ever
been so great to cause me to jump into a relationship with a person I barely know. (Then
again, I will engage in a sexual relationship with a woman I know little about. Sue me,
I’m human. Ha!) I really need to understand the common logic of people when they jump
into these instant relationships. Really, how long do you expect this to last? In a
thoroughly planned relationship, paradise lasts about one to two years if you’re lucky.
Paradise in an instant relationship should last…Hmmm…Maybe, two months? Then here
comes drama. I could never fathom how a person could have drama with someone they
barely know. Where does the drama come in? We had sex, great! We jumped into a
relationship the moment after sex, oh okay. We really can’t stand each other as human
beings, let’s break ties. Simple huh? Nope! Why are people so bitter over someone they
shouldn’t been with in the first place? Is it because they’re feeling foolish for getting into
the situation in the first place? My advice is, step back to paragraph two, and just keep it
as a friendly sexual relationship. If that doesn’t work, and someone insists on developing
a relationship from sex and thin air, walk away! Run away quickly because that person is
crazy and you’d be crazy to agree upon something so insane.

Whoever came up with the label baby daddy or baby momma? I feel that title is so
degrading and belittling to the person that helps to bring your child into this world. Where
does this drama come from? Bitterness? Jealousy? Anger? Why do women lose their
minds over useless men? Understand something, a child won’t keep a man or create a
bond with an invincible relationship. It’s very ignorant to use a child as a shield to battle
in the war of parenting. The key word: parenting. Parenting is the methods, techniques,
used or required in the rearing of children. So bottom line parents: cut the drama out; it’s
about the children not what you two had at one point or have done to each other in the
past. Ladies, cut the crazy stalking of the new girlfriend, busting out windows, or fist
fighting in the middle of the streets. You’re ladies, not savages; it’s not becoming of
yourself or a good look for your child to see. I really want to know, ladies, why do you
put yourselves through situations like that? Grow up and let go. Your sanity and child’s
future are way more important than inflicting pain on your child’s father. Men, fathers,
huddle up. Let me talk just to you for a second. First question, why the heck would you
ever put up with these ignorant shenanigans? Why embarrass yourself as a man trying to
out argue a woman. Is it pride? What goes through a man’s head to have a shouting match
with the mother of his child? It wasn’t always like this. How did things turn so sour?
There are other ways to get back at an ignorant woman. (Yeah, I am promoting revenge.
So what?) There are other ways to get your point across without arguing and still be a
father, if that’s what you chose to be; just keeping it honest. If your child’s mother is
arguing with you, walk away because if it’s not about your child it’s just nonsense. Get up
early the next day and go to family court to file for some form of custody. This way, you
cut the middle drama out and are still able to handle your job as a father. At the end of the
day, baby momma and daddy drama isn’t cute or cool. When did it become acceptable to
be a baby daddy or momma? When did it become cool to glorify your personal drama
with your child’s parent? When did the drama outweigh parental responsibilities?

Before I go, hot love drama isn’t cool. Friends with benefits (sexship) are just two
people enjoying each other sexually. Leave the drama at home, sex shouldn’t involve

drama. Instant relationships shouldn’t exist. If you don’t know the person’s favorite color
but know the color of their underwear, you shouldn’t be so quick to start a relationship.
Keep it safe sex or nothing at all, just say no to instant relationships. Baby momma/daddy
drama is unnecessary. Once a child comes along, regardless of relationship status, the
focal point is the upbringing of your child. If you all can’t get along then God bless your
child. If more people take a second to think about what they’re going into and weigh out
their options, maybe we would have less crazy, bitter women and angry, tough guys in
this world. If anyone wants to share thoughts about my inquires, or wants to give insight
based on or about their situation inbox me on Facebook. Type my name into the search
engine, and then SHAZAM! I will appear.

I’m Eric Blair; hope you’ve enjoyed reading my piece.
Peace! And see you soon!

Bonus: A Song of the same name…who knew. lol

Lyrics here

About Mr. Blair

Eric Blair was born in August of 1984 in Philadelphia, PA, and raised in the North Philly section of the city. He has always enjoyed stories, schemes, and the complexities of plots. At a young age he discovered that he could create narratives full of adventures, creativity, and intrigue. It was this realization that caused him to fall in love with the art of storytelling. At age of twenty-one Eric began writing comic books. His first professional book “Hip-Hop Chronicles” was written for Space Dawg Entertainment in 2004. Eric’s writing style ranges from descriptive to expository writing, where the writing serves to explain and inform the audience. He uses thoroughly developed characters, clever situations, and witty conversation style and tone to keep readers engaged. Eric is inspired by authors who can evoke an emotional response from the reader, as well as authors who can blend elements of fact with fiction to construct a great piece. Eric is currently working on a series of comic books that are soon to be published, his recent writings have been guest featured on several online blogs. He works on perfecting his craft by consistently updating his work, editing pieces, reviewing the latest relevant material, and surrounding his self with like minded, creative, intelligent people.


  1. spike love
    March 17th, 2011 5:13

    Hi Eric Blair! I don’t know what Shyaine is talking about, I think you’re an awesome writer! Very engaging, informative, and I love that you “write as you speak.” I always got into trouble for this in school/ college, but if I’m writing about my opinion and/ or observations, I want people to hear me as if I’m sitting next to them having a conversation! Just my opinion…this is a blog, not a manuscript on quantum physics, smh lol!

    Spit, I love this blog & LOVE that you regularly feature Mr. Blair. That is all 🙂


    • March 17th, 2011 7:13

      Thanks Spike, do the right thing & spread the word


    • Mr. Blair
      March 17th, 2011 21:06

      Thanks for the love! I am really happy you enjoy my work. Thank you for checking my work out daily; I’ll continue to create good food for thought. Thank you!


  2. Shyaine
    October 11th, 2010 13:57

    No debate over here, and I must decline your challenge.

    I am not currently, have never been, nor ever will be a fan of James Baldwin’s work. = )


  3. Ta
    October 9th, 2010 23:20

    It’s important that we encourage each other as writers and readers.

    Shyaine, your points are moot for two reasons: He clearly states that he’s writing about the confusing times in relationships, therefore, these are not his thoughts on relationships as a whole. Also, it’s a blog, which can be written in any format that one chooses.

    This piece is conveyed clearly and efficiently. Yes, it’s based on experience and expressed in a conversational tone, so what? How does that invalidate him as a writer? We should be appreciative of a young, black male addressing a topic that has long been taboo in our community; and for addressing these issues in a light hearted manner, making it approachable, and a comfortable read. Respect a man’s insight and his courage to share such sentiments.

    Furthermore, be a CONSTRUCTIVE critic. Why not give suggestions for improvement? Discouragement is counterproductive, why attack the writer instead of contributing to the conversation? As I stated initially: It’s important that we encourage each other as writers, and readers.


  4. Mr. Blair
    October 5th, 2010 18:03

    Yeah, why? What makes you feel this way? It’s your opinion but I am happy I got your attention. Hi, I’m Eric Blair. Maybe you can check out more of my “work” & “other projects” soon.


  5. Shyaine
    October 5th, 2010 13:22

    Eric Blair ===> discredited as a writer in my “book” (no pun intended) from here on out…


    • October 5th, 2010 16:08



      • Shyaine
        October 8th, 2010 13:38

        Long explanation short, I hope this isn’t really how you think, feel, and view relationships. Or express your ideas about relationships. And your execution could have been a bit more — experienced. Reading this I felt like somebody was having a conversation with a buddy sitting at the bar…or like, a 17 years old wrote this. I didn’t take anything from it, and a lot of the times I found myself going “WTF?!” For lack of a better word I’d call it “ghetto”.


        • Mr. Blair
          October 10th, 2010 3:26

          Again, that’s your opinion but all I ask from you is to give me an article better than the one I wrote. Write an article about the same topic but SHOW ME how it should have been written, that’s all I ask of you before you “think” you know what you’re speaking about of.

          P.S. Look up James Baldwin’s work; a lot of his writing are in a conversational tone…That’s what I was aiming for 😉


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