I’ll start off by stating that this was the first Mad Decent Block Party that I’ve ever attended. I’ve heard great things about it and I was excited to attend.

Then I’ll say this:

This wasn’t an environment fit for kids.

I don’t know what the hell Puma thought when they put “all ages” on the advertisement, but they got it wrong.

At one point the host instructed the audience that crowded the Great Plaza at Penn’s Landing to scream, “FUCK YOU” to no one in particular–which they did. I suppose my motherly instincts kicked in because I immediately began to search for any children that may be in the vicinity. I counted at least eight children under the age of the 10 and I was instantly pissed–more so than the parents seemed to be, which is fine, but false advertisement none-the-less.

Had I been a parent, all hell would have been raised at the false advertisement.

And don’t get me wrong, I have a potty mouth, but I also censor myself as needed.

Now if you were 21 and over (or let’s be real: if you’d managed to get in and get your hands on alcoholic beverages without being carded), then you’d probably enjoy it…possibly…with a few exceptions:

1. If you don’t enjoy being wet–especially without your consent–this event wasn’t for you. Water guns were distributed to attendees who more often than not were intoxicated. This means that they didn’t give a damn whether you were down for the water gun fight or not–if you got caught in the line of fire, well then honey you were simply a disregarded casualty. No apologies.

2. If you were VIP, you needed to understand that it only got you access to the upper platform of the Great Plaza and NOT the backstage area–even if the misinformed staff members told you otherwise. I had to be escorted out of the area as a result. I wasn’t a happy camper and I made sure the staff knew that.

3. If you did arrange for VIP and thought you’d have access to free Heineken’s, you were mistaken. While they had an abundance of Red Bull and sugar-free Red Bull, Heineken’s were a limited commodity. So if you weren’t drunk, and didn’t mind being wired, they had you covered.

4. If you expected entertaining music, they pretty much delivered. According to attendees, one of the exceptions was Riff Raff. If you don’t know who he is: he was one of the men eliminated from “G’s to Gent’s“, Mr. Bentley‘s reality TV show. The last thing I heard spoken about him was, “He sucks”, as the group walked away from the stage. Not taking shots, just reporting the facts.

Other than the above listed, I enjoyed my–sober–self for the few short hours that I spent there. Granted I’m sure I would have had a better appreciation for the event had I been intoxicated beyond care, but I wasn’t. Although I’m surprised I wasn’t intoxicated with how loud the environment was.

If you’re of a certain age, you know what the hell I mean.

Yeah.

The event was open game for anyone on the prowl for a warm body. People danced with one another freely and the least possible amount of clothes worn were best.

A bra and shorts were perfectly acceptable attire.

Therefore my sundress and flat sandals placed me in the “overdressed” category.

Go figure.

This definitely wasn’t the quality of block party that started at its inception. In fact the Mad Decent Block Party has grown considerably since it first entered the Philly scene a few years ago.

I didn’t stay long enough to see all of the acts and from what I learned, the night only got more ratchet, so I’ll leave this recap right here and simply provide a gallery for you to enjoy.

Someone let me know how the Converse Block Party was.